210: Trauma

Trauma

I hugged Jing Tian as we left the ward. His body was stiff and his fingers were cold. "Jing Tian, it's alright now. Let's not think of those things anymore." I patted his back gently.1

His barely discernible tremble pained my heart. Jing Tian pulled me and walked out without saying a word. His face was pale.

I immediately texted Su Shen. Jing Tian didn't look like he should be driving.

Jing Tian and I sat in the backseat. I held his hand and warmed his palm. Jing Tian looked out the window and said nothing.

My mind went through the events that had happened over the past few days. It felt like a large, invisible net had opened up over us. I had no idea it was meant for me or Jing Tian, but it was full of malice and blood.

After we reached home, Jing Tian trapped himself inside his study. After I had a quick word with Brother Gao Da, I went to Jing Tian's study carrying a glass of warm milk. 

I had never seen Jing Tian so dispirited. He was curled up in front of the window and his sleeves were rolled to his elbows. His collar button was undone. The wineglass in his hand was empty. I walked over to snatch away the wineglass. I crouched down and hugged him gently, "Jing Tian, what's wrong?"

During the kidnapping, my head was injured, and I lost my memory. The others were scared but escaped unscathed. Jing Tian was the most severely injured. He sacrificed himself to save the other 4 but the 4 of them turned on him. That had left a trauma in him. No one had noticed this before.

The injuries on his body were healed but not the ones on his heart. In my embrace, Jing Tian slowly relaxed. He hugged my waist and leaned his head on my chest.

"Nanxing, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Jing Tian muttered.

I didn't say anything but patted his back gently.

"At that time, I thought you were dead. When I was recovering overseas, I would dream about you covered in blood. I hated myself for failing to save you.

"But after I came back, I heard that you were still alive. When I saw you again, you were alive and kicking but you didn't remember who I was. You were very happy with Jing Ning. I was happy and sad so I chose to leave this place and went overseas to study.

"But I couldn't escape from that dream. The dream was either you covered in blood, or the other 4 laughing and dancing around us as our blood mingled together."

Jing Tian was still trapped in the nightmare from that kidnapping.

I hugged him and kissed him on his forehead. "But everything's okay now. We're alive and well. Jing Tian, I am alive because you protected me and now I will protect you. We will never be injured or separated again." I whispered into his ear and comforted him slowly. My heart bled.

This was the first time I felt that amnesia wasn't a bad thing. At least, those memories wouldn't haunt me.

How did Jing Tian manage to survive all these years? How strong he must be to survive until this day? No one would have believed that the leader of the Ardent Flame Alliance was still traumatized by the events from his youth.

The thing that hurt Jing Tian was not the physical pain but the dark side of human nature.

And now, Gu Yan was still trying to win him back using their shared memories from childhood. She had no idea that she was basically carving Jing Tian's heart again and again whenever she did that.

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