189: In fact, you simply want him to die

In fact, you simply want him to die

By the time he opened his eyes in a daze, An Qingze had already left the house. I didn't know if he would think too much about what happened last night, but I did my best. I could n' t do it at all. At least I couldn't do it yesterday, unless I tore myself apart. 2

When I went out, I found that the crescent moon was not there, and Qi Mo was still sitting in the living room.

"Where's the crescent moon?" I asked Qi Mo.

Qi Mo said," We don't need to go to school this weekend. Crescent Moon and her father are going to play Lechuang."

I nodded and felt helpless. Even though it had been four years, to Qi Mo, An Qingze would always be the father of the crescent moon, my husband and uncle, but it could never be his father.

I sat across from him for dinner and Qi Mo came over. I raised my head and asked," Mommy, when are we going to find Daddy again?"

I slammed the table with all my strength, and the anger that had been brewing since last night could not help but burst out." Qi Mo, you're enough! Did you remember what you promised me yesterday? "You said you wouldn't bring up these things at home."

Qi Mo shrunk back in grievance." I just feel like Daddy doesn't remember me anymore, so I want to see Daddy more so he can remember me."

I frowned and said," Back then, you were also so close to me. Didn't you say you wanted to see me more? "If I had known that you couldn't leave Daddy, I would n' t have taken over you back then. Perhaps there wouldn't be such a troublesome matter now."

I closed my eyes and covered my forehead. I hadn't slept well all night and my head was about to split open. After a long while, when I realized that there was no Qi Mo sound, I opened my eyes in shock.

Qi Mo sat across from me with his head lowered. I couldn't see his expression, but even with such an angle, I could easily see his anger and disappointment. My heart tightened. What had I done just now?

I was so angry at Qi Mo that I just vented my anger and didn't care about his feelings? Perhaps at that moment, I didn't even think of him as a seven-year-old child or my son. I think I might have taken him as a Qi Mu.

"Xiao Mo." I reached out to touch Qi Mo head. But he subconsciously dodged.

My hand froze in the air. I swallowed my saliva awkwardly, and my heart became even more sour.

"Xiao Mo, I'm sorry. Mommy was too impatient just now. I should n' t have said that to you." I said painfully.

Qi Mo still didn't say anything. I was so anxious that I was about to continue speaking. Qi Mo looked up at me with watery eyes, but I realized that I could n' t see the emotions inside.

"Xiao Mo... I opened my mouth and couldn't say anything. I only felt that there was a thousand zhang gap between my son and me.

"Mommy, you don't want Daddy to come back, do you?" "In your heart, isn't it because you want Daddy to die?" Qi Mo said faintly.

I looked at him in shock." No, how is that possible? I didn't!" I panicked and said this, but I kept beating my heart. Could it be that Qi Mo said that there was really no trace?

I felt guilty. In fact, just moments ago, when I couldn't control my emotions and got angry at Qi Mo, what I was thinking was Qi Mu if I was already dead and would n' t appear again? I was even more despicable than I thought.

"Sorry." I told Qi Mo that I could only say that.

"I'm going to find Daddy." Qi Mo said to me indifferently.

I widened my eyes and tightly grabbed the child's clothes." What are you going to do?" He didn't remember how you looked for him anymore, Xiao Mo! Can't we just continue living like this? "His life is also very peaceful now. He lives well. He doesn't need you anymore."

Qi Mo forcefully shook me off and stubbornly shouted," No, no!" Dad wouldn't want me. Mommy, I don't know why you hate Daddy so much. You' ve never forgiven him. Did you know that four years ago, the night his father asked me to stay, he told me that he was going back to China to find a chain. He said that it was a four-leaf herb necklace. He had thrown it into the country and found it now.

He didn't go back for a company meeting. He said that as long as he found the necklace, you would definitely come back and live with us! Mommy, Daddy has always loved you. It was you who abandoned him and rejected him. It was you who didn't love him.

Mommy, I must go find Daddy. I must make Daddy remember me. "I want to live with my parents!"

After Qi Mo said that, he ran out. I watched him open the door. I wanted to chase after him and stop him, but I suddenly stopped in my tracks. Why should I stop him? There were ten thousand reasons I couldn't find Qi Mu, but I could n' t even think of a reason to stop Qi Mo from finding his father.

Four-leaf clover?

My tears fell. How could I not remember? When we were together, I gave it to Qi Mu and made it myself. However, it was something that An Qingze and I learned to make when we were in college to commemorate love together.

Qi Mu, I never knew the truth. I lied to him for so many years!

My hand kept trembling. It turned out that four years ago, Qi Mu had been in trouble because of me. Because he wanted to salvage the past between us, he would return home and take that plane. That was why he would encounter an air crash.

After a long time, Qi Mo didn't come back. I hugged my legs and sat down. I could n' t help but cry softly.

Qi Mu, why are you so affectionate? Why didn't you tell me your intentions earlier? Why didn't you tell me when I was pregnant with Qi Mo just to confirm if it was your son? Why was it that after so many years, when I thought that you were always cold and heartless, you had to let me know so much affection and the traces of love we shouldn't have missed?

I suddenly hated Qi Mu, his love, and his silence. I hated myself even more. No matter how hard I tried, no one in this world could replace Qi Mu appearance and Qi Mu aura. I hated my own uselessness. As long as he appeared, all the so-called efforts of forgetting would be wasted.

At night, when An Qingze came back with the crescent moon, I was still sitting on the ground. An Qingze glanced at me and brought the crescent moon back to the room. After a while, she came out and asked me," What's wrong? You did n' t feel right last night."

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