50: Life and Death

Life and Death

Perhaps Lu He's weakness was a wake-up call to Mother. She wanted to make me stronger, not only physically, but also mentally, so she did n' t want me to get close to her father. In her eyes, I couldn't be too close to Lu Chenjun, but Lu Chenjun people were small and big. There were plenty of ways to get close to me, and to her, the friendship between Lu Chenjun and my siblings was extraordinary...

Everyone could tell that they were helpless, but being helpless did not mean that there was nothing wrong. A word of apology could resolve the conflict, but it could not wipe away the scars on their hearts.

"I didn't ask you to forgive me, just to tell you the truth. You've also grown up. As a member of the family, you have enough information. As for how to measure it, it's your business. "Since your grandfather left, our family hasn't had much of a decent life. Something like that happened to him again... Fortunately, you and Chen Jun have a good relationship. In the future, this family will depend on you."

He had always said it very heavily, and only when he mentioned me and Lu Chenjun did he smile with relief. His words had already reached this point, so I had a lot of confidence in his mind.

Father was a member of the Gu family. He would rather work hard than have a peaceful family. Yes, our family had indeed been peaceful for a long time, but it was desolate. The people's hearts were colder and the family did n' t look like a family. To put it bluntly, Mother had caused all of this. Father had struggled for half a and could only do this.

In the end, he loved his mother more than anyone else. He had always followed his mother when his grandfather was still alive. After his grandfather left, he used all his grievances to keep me by his grandmother's side. From now on, it was difficult for him to raise his head and keep his chest in front of his mother. He had given all his patience and affection to a woman and did not hesitate to ignore his mother and daughter...

All of this was undoubtedly love! It was just that love based on other people's misfortune was not worthy of tears. Instead, it was rejected.

"Dad, thank you for telling me this. Treat me like an adult."

I smiled quietly. Even if I didn't fully understand what he said, I did n' t want to blame him. It wasn't that he was aloof and refined, or that he did n' t want to waste his feelings. The past had passed, and he couldn't see it anymore. Lu Xuan was right. The most important thing was to cherish the present. The saddest thing was to cherish but not cherish.

He grinned at me but changed the subject." I hope you understand. I'm not calling you Daddy from the bottom of your heart, but just because I' m your daughter."

As I spoke, the light in his eyes gradually dimmed, and I suddenly felt a little uncomfortable. Just as I was about to say something to ease the atmosphere, the phone on his desk started to vibrate. For some reason, I had a bad feeling, and my heart felt weak.

He listened to the person on the other side of the phone and looked at me, as if he had fulfilled the feeling. He hung up.

"Yan Yan, your grandmother has been pushed into the emergency room!"

I suddenly stood up and shook my hand to knock over the glass of milk. I didn't care about it when I spilled it all over my body. I was flustered and my mind went blank. I did n' t even know how to get to the hospital.

When he reached the hospital, he glanced at his hands and realized that his father had pulled me over.

"How is it?" I rushed over at the speed of a hundred meters, and I almost lost my balance. I Lu Xuan pulled at me, and as soon as I stopped, I couldn't wait to ask.

"I just entered. The situation is unknown."

A red light separated the two worlds. Grandma walked on the edge of life and death, and we experienced the most intense wait.

I clutched each other's hands as I paced back and forth, fidgeting and fidgeting. The slightest movement could attract my attention. If I could, I would rather be lying inside. As long as Grandma was safe, I would be willing to endure all the pain on her behalf.

I didn't know how long it had been. It was n' t long before the big surgery, but I felt like it had never been so long. It wasn't like a long night.

The familiar-looking attending doctor pushed open the door that seemed to have experienced the vicissitudes of life. His eyes were solemn and cold. He took off his mask and opened his lips a few times. I was shocked, and then I felt a terrible pain.

"The patient wants to see his granddaughter. Go in." He looked around and finally landed on me. I didn't know what kind of expression I had, and I could n' t even cry.

When he saw that I couldn't recover, he did n' t rush or yell at me like he did before. He would probably become spoiled and humiliated after seeing the life and death.

"Hurry up. Don't let her wait too long..." She could n' t afford to wait...

My Mu Mu's expression finally reacted. He blinked twice in a daze and grabbed Lu Xuan hand like he was grabbing a straw.

"Accompany, accompany me..." I didn't dare to accompany me alone. I could n' t bear to see Grandma leave in front of me. The most important person in my life was withdrawn from my world.

So, stay with me...

"Okay." With just one word, everything went without saying.

Grandma was lying quietly in a corner of the sickroom. Lu Xuan and I approached quietly, but she still heard the commotion. She closed her eyes with difficulty, but she kept smiling.

"Grandma..." I knelt down and held her hand tightly. I felt like I could feel the warmth of her body slowly dissipating.

"Grandma..." I tried my best to hold back my tears and pursed my lips into a smile. I used extra force in every move, as if I had to do it well even if I wanted to exhaust my strength.

Grandma had said that she mustn't cry if she wanted to smile and say goodbye.

"Xiao Jiu, you must remember what Grandma said... Don't cry. You must always be happy. "You're happy. Grandma will rest in peace even if she dies..." She spoke intermittently. Her voice was very soft and low. I focused my mind to hear it clearly.

I didn't dare to sob or even breathe lightly. I was afraid that I would miss a word from her without paying attention.

"Tell your father that you don't have to feel ashamed of me and your grandfather anymore. Nothing is important to anyone who's alive. In the past, let me and your grandfather take them away... bury me and your grandfather together... I'm also considered... perfect..."

These two words exhausted all of Grandma's strength. Her voice drifted down, and the hand that I held instantly lost its strength. She slept peacefully, as if she had fallen into a wonderful dream. It was her grandfather that she had been thinking about day and night...

"No... Grandma, don't leave..."

I finally broke into tears and cried out hoarsely. I grabbed Grandma's hand and did n' t dare to let go, as if it was proof that Grandma was still alive. When I was young, she brought me across the river to catch fish. As long as I caught her, she wouldn't let go of my hand.

The door was pushed open as I cried. Lu Chenjun and Dad rushed in. It was as if he couldn't believe the scene before him. He shook his head and bent his knees. Following the muffled sound of the floor, his father knelt heavily in front of the bed. His face was buried in his hands and he bent down. He was crying and holding back. Only after experiencing it personally did he know that he would never be able to feel a sense of guilt. We did n' t understand how painful it was. Only his father could deeply understand it.

The white cloth covering Grandma's body was pulled up bit by bit, and Grandma's pale face was finally covered.

"No... No... Grandma, you came back. You said you would stay with me for many years, spend many years at the end of the year with me, spend a lot of birthdays with me. You still have to make me longevity noodles and make me dumplings... Don't leave... Do n' t leave Xiao Jiu alone..."

Like a broken child, I stubbornly held Grandma's hand. As I counted on Grandma and me, I cried and wanted Grandma to come back to fulfill her promise.

If she were still a child, she wouldn't be troubled by separation from life and death. She would n' t be worried that Grandma would leave me. Even if she was heartless, she would still have someone who would accompany me to pamper me.

In this life, Grandma had given me too much good. Everything was so unforgettable that it was as sweet as rain and dew. But at this moment, they had all melted their bile into their mouths and flowed into their hearts.

Why? I really don't understand why I ca n' t give me a chance to use the rest of my life to repay the sweetness and happiness she gave me.

She walked without a hitch, but she also took away my worries. What should she use to fill this gap? Confusion, fear, and helplessness surged over in an instant, like a stone in my heart, making me unable to breathe.

I was in such a state of mental entanglement, and no one else would persuade me to let go. Lu Xuan only then did I notice my abnormality. I knew that it was useless to say anything when I stepped into the bull's horn. I covered my hand and with a little force, I broke my hand apart.

I wasn't convinced. I reached out another hand to reach Grandma, but Grandma was pushed far away. I tried to get up and chase after her, but Lu Xuan pushed me into my arms. My hands tightened tightly around me. No matter how hard I beat him, he would n' t let go.

I was flustered and exasperated. I bit his shoulder and he let out a muffled groan. His hands didn't relax and instead rubbed against the back of my head

"Lu Yan, calm down. Grandma doesn't want to see you like this."

Tears welled up in my eyes when I heard that, but it wasn't as excited as before. I let go of my teeth and leaned against his chest to calm my emotions. My breathing gradually became lighter. He probably thought I was tired from crying and fell asleep. The moment I let go, I looked at him with wide eyes.

"What's wrong?" "Are you alright?" He stretched out his hand to straighten my hair and touched my face with his slightly cold fingers. He was afraid of disturbing me and gently wiped away the tears.

At this moment, my mind was in an empty state. I subconsciously did not think about what I had experienced just now. I stared at his shoulder in a daze and touched it gently like regret.

"Sorry, I..."

However, he didn't care. He smiled and pressed a finger against my lips.

"Needless to say, I'm sorry. As long as you' re fine..." As he said that, he bent over and hugged me. He didn't resist as fiercely as he did just now. His embrace was much gentler.

"As long as you're fine, I' m fine."

I leaned in his arms, the smell of his body swirling around his nose. I reached out to hug him and closed my eyes to feel at ease.

Fortunately, you were by my side.

As Grandma had promised, she and her grandfather had been buried together and gone with her in the countryside. I thought it would be a fallen leaf!

Grandma's head was seven. Lu Xuan and I went back to visit Grandma. Standing in front of Grandma and Grandpa's tombstone, they all had such kind and kind smiles. All the joys and sorrows they had experienced in the past were hidden in this smile. 0

I suddenly had a feeling of peace. Even if they had left and never left, they would always live in my heart. It was the eternal warmth in my heart. Whenever, it would make my heart warm.

It was drizzling when they came out of the cemetery. Lu Xuan and I walked, but no one thought of avoiding the rain. After walking for a while, it was raining heavily. The bean-sized rain fell and quickly turned into torrential rain.

I was still distracted. Lu Xuan pulled my hand and ran, I realized that the rain was so heavy that I quickly followed him and ran into the pavilion to hide from the rain. Both of them were already wet.

I tossed the water on my body in extreme discomfort, and I was worried when I saw the rain getting heavier.

"The rain comes and goes quickly. Don't worry." Lu Xuan spoke in time to comfort me. I turned my head to look at him and smiled, then said seriously

"Let's go back to Grandma's house, Lu Xuan!"

He stared at my face for a moment, as if he didn't notice anything unusual. He nodded gently." I' ll let you be happy."

Perhaps it was because I was too fragile when Grandma left, Lu Xuan had always treated me with caution, sympathy, or anything else. I didn't want to go into it. I just wanted to spend some time with him.

It was still early to return to the old residence, but it wasn't around lunch time. Unexpectedly, Aunt Yuan was still at home. Lu Xuan and I were both wet. As soon as Aunt Yuan saw us, they anxiously called for us to take a shower and change our clothes. He asked if we had had dinner and got the negative answer before he went to give me Zhang Luo lunch.

She wasn't very hungry, but she did n' t stop her. She felt that once Aunt Yuan got busy, I could see Grandma's shadow. Or maybe she was still in a corner of the old mansion.

Since Lu Xuan and I were both wet, they couldn't afford to waste any time. So, he had to stay in the bathroom outside. I went to the bathroom Grandma used to. I happily brought it up so that there would n' t be any delay.

I took my laundry and turned around to leave, but I was pulled by Lu Xuan to stop. I looked at his worried expression in confusion and knew what he was thinking. I smiled and patted his hand.

"I'm fine. You do n' t have to worry, huh!" He pressed his lips and clenched his fists to make a cheer. In the end, he didn't say anything. He let go of his hand and followed me.

Actually, I thought that I was fine. I didn't cry even in front of Grandma's tomb. I was surprisingly calm during the past few days when I was doing things for Grandma. I helped to receive a lot of people who came to mourn. I thought that I would really accept the fact that Grandma had died after I cried.

But the moment I walked into Grandma's room, I realized that it was n' t like this. I didn't cry because I was trying my best to remind myself not to think about Grandma. It was like losing memory, deliberately diluting Grandma's mind.

When I stood in the room full of Grandma's traces, those memories surged in my mind like a flood of beasts. Those memories that were once, happy or warm or sour were exceptionally clear in the darkness, as if they covered every corner. As soon as I thought that the person involved in all of this was no longer here, I felt distressed...

I was a trapped beast trapped by painful memories. I couldn't break through, so I could only paint the ground as a prison and add a layer of shackles to my body. When Lu Xuan broke through the door, I squatted in my arms and cried in pain. I was both miserable and pitiful...

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