317: The transparent one

The transparent one

Adela's perception of Andreas had undergone various shifts and transformations over the year she had known the members of House von Conradie. Only one aspect remained constant: Andreas, like Egon, was a true gentleman.1

Rather than pressuring her to promise confidentiality about their conversation, he concluded the meeting with an earnest request, leaving the decision to her discretion.

"Father was the one who wanted your son to live in the first place. Meddling in either of your affairs is not my intention," Adela replied calmly.

"I appreciate it," Andreas said with a smile.

Adela retrieved the artifact and stood up from her seat. She began making her way toward the massive door with Andreas following closely. Just as they were about to reach the door, he stopped her by grasping her arm.

"My apologies; I wasn't paying attention to them. It seems they're still arguing outside."

She had only just begun to hear her husband's and Bastian's voices when Andreas mentioned it.

"…Perhaps I should remain seated," she pondered.

"No, you have every right to hear this. If they had a private issue, they should have taken it elsewhere."

It was rather uncomfortable at first, but with their voices growing louder, it was easy to concentrate on the discussion taking place in the hallway.

"I have the right to choose my business partners. If you persist in objecting, we'll simply part ways."

Hearing the disrespectful tone Bastian was using towards his brother, she felt her hands grow colder. For it was Bastian of all people who had always been Egon's soft spot.

"You can't freely utilize your shares as you see fit. It's not right." Egon reasoned.

"You can't continue binding me to your words and orders through finances!"

"I am not binding you, Bastian. We're family; let's discuss your needs and act accordingly."

"What family! You're starting to sound like a damned nobleman! Just because Andreas decided to invent a surname and attach it to us, that doesn't make us a family!"

Adela stifled a gasp when she felt a sharp pain pricking her stomach right where she usually sensed the mate bond.

"You can't keep throwing tantrums like this. I still haven't forgotten what happened last week. You're not holding true to your word!"

"I already told you. I don't want to discuss that any further," Bastian's tone lowered to match Egon's. "I went to Kolhis because of my own delusions about the situation. It was your decision to waste your time following me. Just as it was my choice to waste years of my life following you," 

"…Bastian, you were one day old when you lost your parents. Who else would you have followed other than me?"

"You were a child back then too. Why do you act like you weren't? Ugh! Arkin; I should have gone with him when I had the chance to."

She clutched her stomach when she felt another stab. 

"Saying something and actually doing it are two very different matters," Egon murmured dryly. 

"I am serious! I don't want to dwell in the past anymore!"

"We aren't."

"We are! We're still paying for the sins of our ancestors. We've never had the chance to make our own fricking mistakes! I want to live my life and make my own choices. I'm not the weakling you've always seen me as!"

"Then stop behaving like one!" Egon burst out.

Adela hugged herself, wishing she could leave the conference hall and end their argument, but she still felt like too much of a stranger to intervene. She glanced at Andreas, who wore a patient expression. Perhaps the brothers often had heated arguments like this?

No, this seemed to be part of the changes Bastian was undergoing.

"For years, I watched you as I walked in your shadow... I saw how draining it was, battling the pain of your scars all alone in the wilderness. The more you thought you were hiding it the more obvious it became. But have you ever seen me struggling with my scar?"

"Yours doesn't burn," Egon argued, darkly calm again.

"In my nightmares, I feel the sharp pain of that claw in my eye every time."

"Don't… We need to leave all of that behind us."

"I can't! Look at me! I'll always be like this! I don't want this life, Egon!" He growled. "You shielded me with your body. You've been shielding me ever since. The view in front of my eye was always your back! I am sick of it! If I seem like a weakling now, it's because that's the man you've made me into!"

"...You're not weak. If you're bringing this up now just to gain financial freedom—"

"It's not about that! I'm trying to make you see how my attachment to you has shaped me. But you don't want to listen, do you? You prefer if I keep it all inside and continue living like an invisible existence, unseen by anyone, especially you! Your scars don't burn anymore, and you married the daughter of our mortal enemy, but this scar on my face will always remind you of that day, won't it?"

"What are you talking about?!"

"I am talking about independence! I can assess the risks I'm taking by starting my own business, does that mean anything to you? I want to live my life unburdened by the past that haunts you! Everything is always about you!"

"That is not true," Egon denied, his voice strained. 

"Who brought that letter here? Who do you think the person who wrote it was coming to see? It's always you, Egon, never me!"

"You're not thinking clearly."

"We will not agree on things from here on out, Egon. You don't see things from my perspective, and I've run out of patience with you... Let it be your way for now, only until I make a decision you can't control."

When the sound of heavy footsteps receding in the distance reached her ears, she knew that Bastian had turned his back on his older brother and left. She could have gone out immediately, but her feet seemed rooted in place.

"He needs you," Andreas said, standing beside her and motioning for her to go forward.

A peculiar thought crossed her mind. She pondered whether Andreas meant her husband needed her or if he was referring to Bastian. Couldn't he see that both of them were in pain?

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