159: Crying over Arkin's shoulder

Crying over Arkin's shoulder

As Adela climbed the steps to her room, her mind was set on closing the chapter of her recent encounter with Egon. She was set on shedding the burden of sorrow and focusing on her responsibilities.2

First things first, Adela knew she needed to change out of her riding attire and meet with the Majordomo and the Baroness. They would discuss the invitations to the nobles and finalize the arrangements for the soiree, both tasks demanding her immediate attention.

Turning the corner, she entered the corridor leading to her room and was met with the unexpected sight of Arkin engaged in a hushed conversation with his mother outside her door. Both of them turned their gazes towards Adela, their eyes widening as they took in her pale complexion and bloodshot eyes.

"Adela?" Arkin's voice resonated with concern.

Adela took a couple of steps back, aching to flee from the scene. But before she could make it to the stairs, Arkin swiftly closed the distance and intercepted her, effectively blocking her way.

Looking up into his alarmed hazel eyes, she lost her willingness to fight in their depths. Without a second thought, she threw herself into his comforting embrace, allowing her tears to flow freely.

Her cries reverberated through the corridor, unrestrained and raw, belying the composed facade she had maintained throughout her adult life. Arkin remained silent, offering only the calmness of his warmth and the gentle touch of his large hand patting her back as she trembled with each sob.

"What happened?" the Baroness's voice quavered with fear.

Finally collecting herself, Adela extricated herself from her brother's embrace, her gaze fixed on her room as she made her way there once more. She opened the door and stepped inside, leaving it ajar as a silent invitation for Arkin to follow.

"Go ahead and begin the preparations, Mother. I will join you after speaking with Adela," Arkin's voice was firm, allowing the Baroness to entrust him with Adela as she made her way towards her duties.

As the door clicked shut, Adela turned to face Arkin, her eyes scanning his weary expression. The residue of tears clung to her cheeks as she asked, "What's wrong with you?... Other than me...I mean."

Arkin shook his head, dispelling any concerns about his own troubles. "Don't divert the subject. Tell me everything."

He moved towards the seat Egon had occupied during his first visit, and Adela felt a fresh wave of tears threatening her. Unable to resist their release, she surrendered to her emotions once again, pouring out her heart to her brother as she sat across from him.

Reaching into his pocket, Arkin retrieved a handkerchief, one she had lovingly embroidered for him, and placed it on her side of the table. Adela gratefully took it, using it to wipe away the remnants of her tears.

"I can't fully comprehend what has happened within the adjacent estate, but Egon can't treat me like this!" she began, starting from the climax of her ordeal. "Merely hours have passed since he professed his love for me!"

Arkin briefly averted his gaze, a flicker of discomfort crossing his features before he met her eyes once more, his brow slightly furrowed.

A lone tear traced its way down Adela's cheek as she continued. "Egon... He is retreating into himself again."

"He has never been one to openly share his thoughts and feelings, Adela. Yet, that did not hinder your connection with him," Arkin spoke in a low, understanding tone, his expression an open book.

Clutching her throbbing temples, Adela looked up at Arkin, recalling Egon's symbolic words atop the hill when he presented her with the falcon. "He spoke of the need to give others reasons to draw closer, to allow them the choice," she gasped, her realization dawning. "How could I have been so naive?"

Arkin leaned forward displaying his eagerness to listen without interruption. He was acutely aware of the challenges Egon faced, particularly in light of his uncle's suicide attempt. However, he had sworn on his honor as a knight to maintain strict confidentiality, entrusting the details only to Grace de Lanak.

"I believed him... I confessed my feelings to him," Adela finally blurted, her vulnerability laid bare as she spoke. Her gaze faltered, unsure of how her confession would be received. Yet, when her eyes returned to her brother's face, she found no judgment.

"How could I abandon everything I was taught not to do?" she cried.

"Because you trusted him," Arkin replied.

Her countenance hardened, bristling with resistance. "Don't say that. Don't speak of trust, not when someone can change their perception of the relationship so swiftly!" Tears spilled once again, they came in muffled cries as she buried her face in the soft fabric of her brother's handkerchief.

"...I will never trust Egon von Conradie again."

Arkin reached across the table, taking hold of her hand, his grip firm and reassuring.

"One should never make decisions in such a state of mind. You must find calmness within yourself before ensuring that your actions are not impulsive... The decisions I made in moments of anger and confusion are still ones I regret,"

Whether it was the release of her tears or the relief she found confiding in her brother within the sanctity of her room, Adela felt the heaviness in her chest gradually lighten.

"I wish the soiree wasn't scheduled for today, of all days," Arkin lamented.

Shaking her head, Adela mustered a glimmer of determination. "Why? Even if he does attend, it changes nothing. We had lives before we met each other, and those lives can still continue."

Arkin's expression betrayed a hint of doubt, though he nodded in acknowledgment. "I cannot be late for my responsibilities at the King's former estate. I likely won't see you in the evening. Will you be alright?"

"More than alright. I will ensure that Father's friend receives a warm welcome, and I will do my utmost for Lanark. Now, more than ever."

She had to prove to Egon that she would be fine without him. 

pqdm.com