435: Restless thoughts

Restless thoughts

When they returned to the packhouse, Damon went with Caden to handle some pack-related business as Maya was swamped.0

Maddox was restless after leaving Mindy with Gideon, and there was also the point of telling his parents that he and Mindy both found their mate. But the matter that weighed on him the most was the upcoming talk to Tatiana. Will she accompany him to the Blue River pack?

Maddox and Tatiana touched on the topic of their future, but Tatiana was talking about her company and upcoming fashion shows, and there was no mention of the Blue River pack and her being a Luna and Maddox's mate.

Maddox was nervous. Will she leave him?

In order to release some of his tension, Maddox decided to join Tony when he headed to the training grounds.

That left Tatiana, Kalina, and Talia in the living room.

Talia decided to give attention to her two friends.

Until then, she was thinking about Gideon's words, and about the incident in the study when her wolf took over for a few endless minutes, and about every time her aura came forth and… nothing. Other than her getting a hint of a headache, there was nothing.

Talia needed a mental break, and there were many other things to think about. Like the possibility of an upcoming war.

"Did you guys decide how long you will stay here?", Talia asked Tatiana and Kalina. "I'm not chasing you away, just asking."

Kalina nodded in understanding. "I guess you don't want us to be implicated if Alpha Edward makes his move."

Talia gave Kalina a grateful smile. She was glad that her friend understood. "I know that Tony and Max believe how your presence will deter him from acting, but I think that the man is power-hungry to the point of not caring of who is watching. I don't want you to get hurt just because you are here."

Kalina reached to hold Talia's hand and gave her a reassuring squeeze. "We can help."

"I know.", Talia responded. "But I believe you will be of more help if you are out there. Talk to people who are willing to listen until they understand that Alpha Edward is unreasonable. They don't need to provide reinforcements to the Dark Howlers pack, but if they can decline assistance to Alpha Edward, that will already be a lot of help."

Tatiana slumped back in her chair and let out a long breath. "To be honest, I like it here."

Kalina cocked an eyebrow. "You are just shagging your mate. What is there not to like?"

Tatiana stifled a laugh. "That's not what I meant. I was talking about being myself."

"You sound like you were holding back so far. I don't remember that you lived a life of solitude.", Kalina said teasingly.

"No. I mean…" Tatiana paused while thinking about how to explain. "I spent a lot of time among humans, always watching that I don't move too fast or squeeze too hard during a handshake. Humans look like us, but they are not. I felt caged while suppressing things that come to me naturally, and here I don't need to do that."

Kalina pursed her lips. She grew up around humans also, but she didn't see it as caged. "I always thought about that like practice in control."

Tatiana leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. "That's exactly it. Control. With humans, we need that. Here, I can do what I want, how I want it, and people won't look at me like I'm a freak. I remember attending one of my first parties and when I took the champagne flute, the delicate thing shattered in my hand. My date looked at me strangely, and after the third one I broke, the waiter said how the glasses must be flawed because there was no way a refined lady like myself would end up breaking them on purpose. Ah, I still remember going home thirsty because I didn't dare touch those anymore, and everything was fragile crystal…"

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Talia's chest tightened when Tatiana's story reminded her of herself. Damon was warning her to be careful but why did she need to control her powers? Will people think of her as a freak if they find out what she did? What about her friends?

Will Tatiana be grateful that Talia stopped water currents so that Maddox can save her, or will Tatiana fear her?

Gideon said that whatever she can do is a gift from the Moon Goddess, but what's the point of a gift if she can't use it because people might look at her like she is a monster?

Was there a place for Talia where she can be herself and break stuff without people looking at her strangely?

Somehow, Talia remembered Axel. He said that she was welcome in the Midnight Guardians pack. Based on the scene of Meg glowing in the car and Kai's silvery eyes, it appeared that people in the Midnight Guardians pack have such powers. Was that the place where Talia could be herself? But they won't accept Damon because he was not one of them. Was she one of them? How can she know if she belongs to a place she never visited?

Talia nearly jumped out of her skin when a pair of strong arms circled her from behind.

"What's weighing on your mind, kitten?", Damon murmured close to her ear, and she took a deep breath of the forest and the dark chocolate that had the power to ease her nerves.

That's right. Damon was her home. With him, she could be herself and he won't judge her or think of her badly no matter what she did.

"Just… stuff.", she said. Was she actually thinking of going with Axel? No, that's not happening. No matter what, she won't leave Damon. 

She looked up at Damon to meet his icy-blue eyes full of concern.

"I am fine. Really.", Talia did her best to assure him. They already had so many things to juggle and adding more to it won't help.

Acting like things were normal was one of the things that helped her from running away. Where would she run? She didn't know. Maybe into the mountains, or out of the country; wherever she ran, it would be fine as long as Damon was with her, but… would he want to leave all this behind? She shook useless thoughts away.

This place, this pack… it was important to Damon, and he was her most important person and she didn't want to put him in a position to choose. She will be with him in this, for better or for worse. Together. Isn't that what mates do?

Before any of them said anything else, James entered the living room.

Talia felt anxiety bubbling inside her. Wasn't James supposed to spend the day having fun with Petra, Erik, and Zack? And why was James' expression not good?

Talia swallowed hard. If James was back early, it could mean only one thing.

"Is it time?", Talia asked Damon, her voice barely above a whisper. 

Damon gave her a small nod and said words that made her chest tighten.

"Marcy is awake."

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