306: 6.66 What Was Real?

6.66 What Was Real?

Cyrus' jaws clenched. He shut his eyes and forced out. "...You, holding a gun and killing so many people. Old and young, men and women. They were asking you for mercy but you… burned them all down. You just stayed there and watched until their cries subsided, until their bodies reduced to ash..." He let out a trembling exhale. "...until nothing remained."2

Lu Yizhou's sigh puffed out in the form of billowing mists that curled to the sky. His worst, then. 

Of course, with Cyrus' position as the gatekeeper of Heaven, he would definitely delve head-on toward the ugliest part of human's heart. That wasn't surprising at all. Lu Yizhou stared up at the dark, starless sky. He had been inside the simulator for so long… long enough that the hellish scene from that time had become blurred in his memory. 

He used to feel nothing but stark hollowness everytime it haunted him, like a festering wound that devoured him inch by inch until he became nothing but a large, simple void. Now… the hollowness was still there but when he tried to revisit it, his lover's face would pop up in his mind. Their voice, their smile, their warmth, their tears… they persistently cling to him, stubbornly filling the empty part of him with sunshine and rose. 

A light so fierce that it chased the darkness away — his endearing lover.

The corner of his lips curled up without him realizing. Despite the cold weather, Lu Yizhou's heart stayed warm as if he had a mini torch stuck between his ribs. And this time, there was nothing but acceptance when he thought about his past. 

He couldn't erase his sins, and he wasn't such a hypocrite to lie that he regretted them either. If life gave him a second chance, he would still take the same path as he had. 

All those yesterdays, no matter how bleak they were, made up him. Lu Yizhou. The Lu Yizhou that his lover had come to love with all their being.

"I apologize for showing you such an unsightly memory," was what he said in the end.

"It's not—" Cyrus turned to him, frustrated and vexed. He clenched his fists and slowly took a deep breath before exhaling. Again and again until the emotions ebbed away from his face. Then, he shook his head and chuckled bitterly. "Never have I ever become so miffed when faced in situations like these, I swear. I just couldn't leave you alone — you and him, to be exact. In spite of your… deeds, I know you have your own reasons. I know you, Lu Yizhou."

Lu Yizhou faced him with a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "No. You don't know me at all, Cyrus."

Cyrus startled lightly but Lu Yizhou had torn his gaze away, unwilling to divulge anything more. Cyrus didn't know him, nobody did. Nobody had learned the entirety of his life and claimed that they could understand why he did what he had done. And Lu Yizhou had no problem with it. 

He had decided to walk through this single plank bridge, knowing that he would be alone until the very end.

He couldn't help but wonder, was it this belief of his that resulted in his low willmeter?

"But you're not alone anymore." Cyrus muttered softly, jerking Lu Yizhou out of his spiralling thoughts. "I apologize if I sound too nosy but…" He shuffled on his feet, looking uncharacteristically hesitant. "They will be sad if they know what you're thinking. You don't want to see it happen, do you?"

Lu Yizhou couldn't help it, a single laugh escaped his lips and Cyrus snapped his eyes to him, eyes wide in surprise. How sly. Using his lover against him like this knowing that it was his Achilles Heels. Cyrus was still a distant family of reptiles, alright. 

"You're right," he admitted with a huff. "I don't ever want to see them cry out of sadness anymore."

"...You are a gentle soul, Lu Yizhou." Cyrus said after a stretch of silence between them. "Your past notwithstanding, I can sense your kindness and gentleness when you look at them, when you touch them, when you smile at them. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise."

Lu Yizhou snorted inelegantly. "Only for them," he corrected.

Just like that, the strained atmosphere between them shattered and the corner of Cyrus' eyes crinkled with mirth. "Right, even if it's only for them."

Lu Yizhou knew what Cyrus wanted to ask him, thus he didn't beat around the bush. "I still haven't found out anything about you and Luan. My system is still working on it." Cyrus' shoulders slumped down ever so slightly and Lu Yizhou wouldn't have noticed it if his back hadn't been so straight. He continued after some thoughts. "But I have found something about him. Do you want to hear about it?"

Cyrus' eyes lit up and he nodded readily.

Lu Yizhou silently offered his hand. It was better to just show Cyrus what he had seen, to make it easier. Cyrus stared at his hand as if it was a human's head for a moment before gingerly poked him with the tip of his claw. Just like earlier, his eyes fell shut and lines formed on his forehead. Perhaps he had braced himself for what was coming because his complexion didn't change. He only looked deep in thoughts.

"Well?" Lu Yizhou inquired after Cyrus pulled his hand back.

"That person…" The furrow on his brows deepened. "He looks familiar but I am not sure, he might be the image of one of the humans I have crossed paths with in this world. But what was he saying…?"

Lu Yizhou asked, "Have you heard of the brain in a vat theory, Cyrus?"

Cyrus blinked, confused.

Lu Yizhou's gaze drifted to the distance as he recited his newfound hypothesis. It was absurd, insane and literally impossible but what if…? 

"It's said that a human doesn't need a body to survive. If you remove someone's brain from their body, put it in a vat of life-sustaining solutions and connect its neurons by wires to a supercomputer which would provide electrical impulses identical to those the brain normally receives, then the brain will have the illusion that it is still alive. And as a result, it will continue to have perfectly normal conscious experiences. Do you think it sounds familiar, Cyrus?"

Cyrus' eyes were as wide as saucers and his breath hitched sharply. "Are you saying that…"

"Yes. This whole project's operation is to link human's brainwaves to the simulator system. Does it sound awfully similar to the brain in a vat theory?"

"That… That…"

"Who can say that you and I still exist by this point? What if we are all brains in the vats sustained only with nutrient solutions?"

Lu Yizhou had thought about this countless times. 'Real human', Admin God had said. Zachary would finally become a real human, then did it mean that he wasn't 'real' in the first place? What was 'real' to be exact? 

Lu Yizhou knew that the scenery in front of him, the wind that was currently fluttering his hair, the sensation of fabric against his skin, the cold air that filled his lungs — everything was conjured from his brainwaves. All of them weren't real… but at the same time, it felt more real than everything.

In this place, Lu Yizhou experienced joy, sadness, pain and heartbreak; all the feelings he thought had been deprived of him. Most importantly, he met the only man whom he would love for his whole life. 

If all of this wasn't real, then what was?

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A/N: It's ironic how chapter 6.66 doesn't feature our cute 666 at all T^T my apologies, it still hasn't recovered from its top three betrayal of all times

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